Monday, May 25, 2009

9 1/2 hours!!

For the past 3 nights Sam has slept 9 1/2 hours! I am so glad he is getting some really good sleep. He is doing great with naps, too. He takes his first two naps everyday! The late afternoon nap is still a struggle but I can live with him taking just the first two for now. I can already see an imporvment in his mood.

This picture cracks me up. Doesn't he look like a bully here? Like a tough guy? Don't let it fool you. He is the sweetest little thing ever.

Oh, and he loves his jumper!!

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Samuel, 4 months

I can't believe my baby is 4 months already! We just brought him home!

We had his 4 month shots yesterday. He actually did okay. He cried for a second and then got over it. He is my tough little boy.

He weighs 16.13! Nearly 17 lbs! He is now in the 85% in weight and in 59% for height at 25". He is in the 69% for head circumference. Rich is so proud. He says it's because he is going to have a big brain like his daddy :)

I also talked to the doctor about his fussiness and his lack of napping. I told him how we have been sleep training and he said that we are doing exactly what we need to. He said we just need to give it some time and Samuel will fall into a routine. He wants to see us back in 2 weeks to see where we are with the napping and to see if his fussiness improves.

I think by the time we go back to the doctor things will be much, much better. Yesterday Sam did really well with napping and he went right down this morning for his morning nap. So I think he just needed some time to adjust.

After his nap this morning we are going to Babies R Us and getting him a jumperoo activity station. He loves to 'stand'. He gets so pleased with himself. I think it makes him feel like a big boy. I think he will love something that will let him stand and jump and play.

It was last Memorial Day (May 28) that I found out I was pregnant. It's one of my very, very favorite and most cherished memories. We had been in the adoption process for over 2 years with no success and we had been trying to get pregnant for months. I was convinced we wouldn't be able to get pregnant without some medical intervention, so when I saw "Pregnant" on that little stick, I was in shock. One of the greatest days ever.

A year later and we are so blessed.

Hope everyone has a safe and fun Memorial Day weekend!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Under Construction!

Have I mentioned that we bought a house? Actually right now it's just a lot. We bought new construction here in Bellevue. Hooray! They poured the footer yesterday and construction has officially started! The target close date is September 25! We are so excited! I expected this process to be a lot more stressful than it has been. So far it's just been fun and exciting!

We have Sam's 4 month well baby check up tomorrow. I am anxious to talk to the doctor and get his suggestions on sleep training during the day. We actually have continued on with what we started and he has had some really, really awesome days and some really, really bad days. But we just started and he is still learning so I guess that is to be expected. He is a smart little guy so I am sure he'll get it. In fact he has been napping, in his crib, for about an hour now!

Isn't he so cute? He looks like such a big boy in this picture! This was taken right before one of our afternoon strolls. The weather has been beautiful the past few days and we have taken advantage!

Friday, May 15, 2009

Sam might be ready but I am not

I don't know if I can do this.

Today was especially hard. 10 x worst than yesterday. Sam finally conked out at his swing. One of the places we don't want him to nap. He slept 3.75 hours. I woke him at 6, bathed him, fed him and put him to bed at 6:40. He went right to sleep without a peep. Poor guy. This link takes you to a you tube video of a mother sleep training her daughter. The mother in this video is handling the whole let them cry it out thing much better than I do.

I think I might consult with his doctor again before I continue. It's through consistency that babies learn and right now I am not able to commit 100%. I just need more positive reinforcement from his doctor to be positive that I am doing the right thing. Once his doctor gives me the go ahead I think I will feel better about it. I just need that extra reassurance. May 22nd can't get here soon enough.

Sleep training, Day 1

May 14

Ugh. Yesterday was SO hard.

Sam woke up at 6:30.

He was ready for his first nap by 8:00. He cried for about 20 minutes and woke up crying at 9:15.

Second try at a nap was at 10:45. He cried until 11:15. He then woke up at 11:55.

Third try was at 2:10. He cried until 2:40 but then slept until 3:40.

He was exhausted and extremely fussy so he went down for bed at 6:00. He cried for 40 minutes which is not the norm. He usually goes to bed without any crying, and if he does cry it is only for a few minutes.

He woke to eat at 12 am. Went down without any crying and slept until 3:30 when I got him up to feed him again. He was back in his crib by 4:00 and started crying at 4:15.

He woke to start his day at 6 am.

So yesterday he got about 2 1/2 hours of day time sleep. I don't think he got good, restorative sleep last night either. I don't think that even comes close to what he needs. Especially with his night time sleep being so fragmented. He needs good, long, consolidated sleep. I think he is chronically tired and that is why we are where we are now.

This is so hard. I HATE hearing my poor, sweet boy cry. I just want to pick him up and hold him. I just don't know what else to do. I pray that this is the right thing to do and it works soon.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Okay, what gives?

Last night Samuel slept from 6:30 until 2:00 am! 7 1/2 hours! However the night before he slept three hours. The night before that he slept 7 hours and the night before that he slept 4. He is 16 weeks this Friday and we aren't even close to any kind of consistent night sleep pattern. We have a bed time routine and he goes down without any protest. But that is where the consistency ends.

In fact it kind of feels like we have taken some steps back. At 6 weeks of age is when it was hardest for us. His crying was at a peak and he never seemed to sleep. I feel like we are there again. And what makes this so hard is that I had thought we had turned a corner. For about 2 weeks he was napping great and sleeping an average of 6 hours his first stretch not waking until three hours after that. He was better rested and in such a better mood during the day. Now he may sleep 3 hours or 4 hours or even 7 hours some nights, but he is up again after an hour or two hours sometimes.

The one good nap I could count on everyday, his morning nap, has also seem to be nothing more than a fond memory. I am lucky to get a solid strait hour out of him now, whereas before he would sleep 3-4 hours! Yesterday I think he may have slept a total of 2 hours. AALLLL DAY! An hour in the am and then a 15 minute cat nap here, a 30 minute nap there. And I had to be holding him for him to sleep. The moment I put him down he was up. That is also a new problem.

Now this may not be such a stressful point with me if he was in a decent mood. Or if I could entertain him and keep him happy. But as it turns out if my child is tired and doesn't sleep he is EXTREMELY fussy. To the point I am scared to get out of my apartment with him because when he has these meltdowns it takes a while to calm him down. And in order to calm him down I have to basically hold him in a bear hug, bounce him while I pace and pace and pace.Sometimes I have to put a blanket covering his eyes. It's not easy and it isn't pretty. And even then it can take 20 minutes to calm him down. It's a process. And when he gets this way, he doesn't just cry. It would be better described as hysteria. When people, family, friends see him act this way they think he is in pain. I am 100% that he is just simply exhausted, but he just wont or doesn't know how to just give in and go to sleep without major assistance.

When he is well rested he is the happiest baby.. He is constantly smiling and cooing. I can usually catch that 'window' when he is getting drowsy but not yet overly tired. I take him to his room, rock him and sing softly to him. He gets drowsy and I put him down. 10 minutes later all hell brakes loose.

Sometimes I totally miss that window. One moment he will be smiling and playing and in half a second he is screaming his little head off.

When I talk to other people about this I don't think they fully understand. They think I am exaggerating or that I must be doing something wrong. It's not until people witness his fits that they see why I am ALWAYS home and would just rather stay here so I can deal with him in privacy. In fact we have an appointment with a design consultant today at 1:00 and I am a wreck with nerves about how Samuel will be. It's totally a coin toss.

I understand babies get fussy and they cry. But what Samuel does is beyond that. It almost takes an act of God to get him settled down. I just expected to be past this stage at 4 months of age.

And I feel totally alone with this problem. How is it that I am the only one who has a child that completely freaks out because they are overly tired? I talk to other moms about this and no one seems to have had this problem.

God help us. And my poor boy. I know he is miserable. I want him to sleep more for his benefit than mine. Yea, the lack of sleep isn't fun, but I can deal with it. He is just a baby and he needs his sleep. I feel so bad for him.

I think I am going to have to try the dreaded cry it out method. We did that for his night time sleep and he does go to sleep on his own now. That only took 3 days and the longest he cried was the first night one hour. I just don't want to do that for his naps. His doctor said he should be taking three naps a day. If I put him in his crib and let him cry (during the day they say don't let them cry for any more than one hour for each assigned nap time), that is going to be a lot of crying. And it may be days before he gives in and sleeps. But I don't know what else to do. Something has to give. We are both miserable during the day. I feel like we are missing out on so much quality time. He is growing up so fast I so desperately want the both of us to enjoy this time.

We have is 4 month check up next week. I am going to talk to the doctor about what I should do. I know though he is going to tell me to put him in his crib and ignore him if he starts crying before it's been an hour. He told us to do that when he was only 8 weeks and I just felt like he was too young to do that. Now that he is four months I feel like I really need to get a handle on this problem so we can get past it and both be happier.

Graduation Day, May 8th

Tuesday, May 5, 2009